Published by Cindy on August 21, 2017

DO YOU HAVE THE PHONE GUILT?

Being a parent is never how they show it in those artsy lifestyle magazines, or even what you see on those Pinterest accounts that you follow. Somehow, you can never make spaghetti fun or colourful or even have the time to make elaborate castles with playdoh.

The guilty feeling, of not being as fun and entertaining as all these other moms seem to be, never leaves me. I rarely clean my kid’s room, can barely manage to cajole my toddler into eating one portion of vegetables, and I almost never participate in any messy artsy creative stuff. But, the number one thing that I feel the most guilty about is the fact that I use my phone. A lot.

We will be watching another one of Disney’s marvellous creations and I will be sending off work emails. In the mornings, I will be sitting with my cup of coffee while my toddler happily munching on some sandwich or cereal and I will be checking the news on my phone.

I know, it’s awful. I shouldn’t make my kid feel as though whatever is going on in my phone is more important than spending time with family. But, can you really blame me?

T is not as though I am mindlessly scrolling through Facebook, or playing a round of some super addicting game (Candy Crush, anyone?), I am busy doing either work stuff, or paying bills, or shopping for groceries online.

Most of our lives now are lived online. And, I don’t mean just catching up with friends on social media. We even do our day to day work online. And, why shouldn’t we? It is faster, easier and more convenient. Yes, some might feel that using your phone instead of playing with your kid is a grave sin that you can never come back from. But, most of the time I am either looking at new toys I can surprise my kid with, arranging play dates, looking at summer playgroups and what not. Of course, I am not trying to say that I am only on my phone because of my kid. Yes, sometimes I am checking Facebook, and sometimes I am prioritising work emails. But, is that a bad thing? Instead of being shut away in an office where I wouldn’t even be able to see my kid I am opting for an option which allows me to work as well as still be there with my child.

Parenting has become a lot more different from when we were kids. Did our parents never sit with the newspaper while we were having our morning cereal? Don’t we remember waiting in the evenings for our parents to come back from their office?

Yes, I do use my phone a lot. But using my phone enables me to spend extra time with my kid which I wouldn’t have been able to otherwise. Instead of letting a caretaker watch over my kids while I run errands or spend time in the office, I get to do it all from the ease of my home and being able to watch my kid play.

It might not be the perfect solution, but nobody is perfect, right?